Q: What do you call a fat Jack-O-Lantern?
A: A plumkin
Q: What’s a vampire’s favorite fast food?
A: A guy with very high blood pressure
Q: What do you use to mend a Jack-O-Lantern?
A: A pumpkin patch.
Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the ball?
A: Because he had no body to go with!
Q: If you peel my skin off, I won’t cry, but you will. What am I?
A: An onion.
Q: What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about?
A: C sharp or B flat!
Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7?
A: Because 7 8 9!
Q: Why won`t cannibals eat clowns?
A: Because they taste funny!
Q: What was the favorite game at the ghosts’ birthday party?
A: Hide and shriek
Q: What do ghosts serve for dessert?
A: Ice scream
Q: What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
A: Boo-boos
Q: What vegetable do you get when King Kong walks through your garden?
A: Squash!
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road?
A: To get to the body shop!
Q: What do you say to a skeleton going on vacation?
A: Bone voyage!
Offbeat English 
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